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Phyllis Diller quotes

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American comedienne and actress, born 1917
Phyllis Diller quotes
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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won't run.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type”

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