| Quotes with keywords > H > HA > habitable 1-7 Quotations of 7 Habitable quotes
“MAN, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be. His chief occupation is extermination of other animals and his own species, which, however, multiplies with such insistent rapidity as to infest the whole habitable earh and Canada.
When the world was young and Man was new, And everything was pleasant, Distinctions Nature never drew
'Mongst kings and priest and peasant. We're not that way at present, Save here in this Republic, where We have that old regime, For all are kings, however bare Their backs, howe'er extreme Their hunger. And, indeed, each has a voice To accept the tyrant of his party's choice.
A citizen who would not vote, And, therefore, was detested, Was one day with a tarry coat
(With feathers backed and breasted) By patriots invested.
"It is your duty," cried the crowd,
"Your ballot true to cast For the man o' your choice." He humbly bowed, And explained his wicked past:
"That's what I very gladly would have done, Dear patriots, but he has never run." --Apperton Duke” | Ambrose Bierce quotes (American Writer, Journalist and Editor, 1842-1914) Book: Devil's Dictionary quotes
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“WOMAN, n.
An animal usually living in the vicinity of Man, and having a rudimentary susceptibility to domestication. It is credited by many of the elder zoologists with a certain vestigial docility acquired in a former state of seclusion, but naturalists of the postsusananthony period, having no knowledge of the seclusion, deny the virtue and declare that such as creation's dawn beheld, it roareth now. The species is the most widely distributed of all beasts of prey, infesting all habitable parts of the globe, from Greeland's spicy mountains to India's moral strand. The popular name (wolfman) is incorrect, for the creature is of the cat kind. The woman is lithe and graceful in its movement, especially the American variety (_felis pugnans_), is omnivorous and can be taught not to talk. --Balthasar Pober” | Ambrose Bierce quotes (American Writer, Journalist and Editor, 1842-1914) Book: Devil's Dictionary quotes
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“If its individual citizens, to a man, are to be believed, it always is depressed, and always is stagnated, and always is at an alarming crisis, and never was otherwise; though as a body, they are ready to make oath upon the Evangelists, at any hour of the day or night, that it is the most thriving and prosperous of all countries on the habitable globe.” | Charles Dickens quotes (English novelist, generally considered the greatest of the Victorian era, 1812-1870)
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“DULLARD, n. A member of the reigning dynasty in letters and life. The Dullards came in with Adam, and being both numerous and sturdy have overrun the habitable world. The secret of their power is their insensibility to blows; tickle them with a bludgeon and they laugh with a platitude. The Dullards came originally from Boeotia, whence they were driven by stress of starvation, their dullness having blighted the crops. For some centuries they infested Philistia, and many of them are called Philistines to this day. In the turbulent times of the Crusades they withdrew thence and gradually overspread all Europe, occupying most of the high places in politics, art, literature, science and theology. Since a detachment of Dullards came over with the Pilgrims in the _Mayflower_ and made a favorable report of the country, their increase by birth, immigration, and conversion has been rapid and steady. According to the most trustworthy statistics the number of adult Dullards in the United States is but little short of thirty millions, including the statisticians. The intellectual centre of the race is somewhere about Peoria, Illinois, but the New England Dullard is the most shockingly moral.” | Ambrose Bierce quotes (American Writer, Journalist and Editor, 1842-1914) Book: Devil's Dictionary quotes
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