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“When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.”
Gracie Allen quotes (American Actress and Comedian. 1906-1964)
About: Funny quotes, Birth quotes. For: Birth quotes.
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“Remember in elementary school you were told that in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file from smallest to tallest? What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn slower?”
Warren Hutcherson quotes
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes.
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“All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.”
Lily Tomlin quotes (American Actress and Comedian. Mark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2003.b.1939)
Similar Quotes. About: Life quotes, Funny quotes, Dreams quotes.
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“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.”
Robin Williams quotes (American actor)
Similar Quotes. About: Humor quotes, Funny quotes, God quotes, Comedy quotes.
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“When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.”
Emo Philips quotes
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes, Forgiveness quotes.
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“You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes, Youth quotes. For: T-Shirt quotes.
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“Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because they're looking for ideas”
Paula Poundstone quotes (American Comic, b.1959)
Similar Quotes. About: Children quotes, Funny quotes, Adulthood quotes, Ideas quotes.
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“I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure”

Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes.
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“Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.”
Charles M. Schulz quotes (American cartoonist, 1922-2000)
Similar Quotes. About: Cute quotes, Funny quotes, World quotes.
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“Why can we remember the tiniest detail that has happened to us, and not remember how many times we have told it to the same person.”
François de la Rochefoucauld quotes (French classical author, leading exponent of the Maxime, 1613-1680)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes.
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“I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.”
Woody Allen quotes (American Actor, Author, Screenwriter and Film Director, b.1935)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes, Achievement quotes, Immortality quotes.
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