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“Washington is nicknamed "The Evergreen State" because it sounds better than "The Incessant Nagging Drizzle State."”
santiz Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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“My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished 2 bags of M&M's and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“All of us are born with a set of instinctive fears - of falling, of the dark, of lobsters, of falling on lobsters in the dark, or speaking before a Rotary Club, and of the words "Some Assembly Required”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Each year, millions of skiers come to Colorado to experience its superb emergency medical facilities.”
santiz Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be attracted to refrigerators.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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