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“One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a computer microchip, can actually travel ahead in time and shave beard hairs that don't even exist yet”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
About: Humor quotes, Funny quotes, Time quotes, Technology quotes.
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“Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.”
Benny Hill quotes (English Comedian and Humorist, 1924-1992)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes.
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“I am a world-class weenie when it comes to letting people stick needles into me. My subconscious mind firmly believes that if God had wanted us to have direct access to our bloodstreams, He would have equipped our skin with small, clearly marked doors.”
santiz Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes.
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“You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes, Youth quotes. For: T-Shirt quotes.
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“Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.”
Fran Lebowitz quotes (American Writer and Humorist, b.1950)
Similar Quotes. About: Teenage quotes, Funny quotes.
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“When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.”
Emo Philips quotes
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes, Forgiveness quotes.
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“Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason”
Jerry Seinfeld quotes (American television Actor and Comedian, b.1954)
Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes.
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“Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework”
Bill Cosby quotes (American Actor, Comedian and Producer. b.1937, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA)
Similar Quotes. About: Education quotes, Sex quotes, Children quotes, Funny quotes, Comedy quotes.
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“An optimist will tell you the glass is half-full; the pessimist, half-empty; and the engineer will tell you the glass is twice the size it needs to be”

Similar Quotes. About: Funny quotes, Pessimism quotes, Optimism quotes.
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“There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.”
Bill Cosby quotes (American Actor, Comedian and Producer. b.1937, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA)
Similar Quotes. About: Humor quotes, Funny quotes.
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“Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.”
Charles M. Schulz quotes (American cartoonist, 1922-2000)
Similar Quotes. About: Cute quotes, Funny quotes, World quotes.
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