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Quotation:
“
Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot masturbate
”
Dave Barry quotes
(
American
Writer
and
Humorist
best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person
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Magnetism is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Gravity, Duct Tape, Whining, Remote Control, and The Force That Pulls Dogs Toward The Groins Of Strangers.
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Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night
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“
The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.
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Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
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You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.
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Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.
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Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.
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“
It is a well-known fact that although the public is fine when taken individually, when it forms itself into large groups, it tends to act as though it has one partially consumed Pez tablet for a brain.
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Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said "CIGARETTES CONTAIN FAT."
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