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“I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)

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“Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“My school colors were clear. We used to say, "I'm not naked, I'm in the band."”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“Every so often, I like to go to the window, look up, and smile for a satellite picture.”
Anand_Singh Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“The other day I... uh, no, that wasn't me.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?"”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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“If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too?”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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