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“I haven't trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I've never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)

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“Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
Similar Quotes. About: Success quotes, Fame quotes.
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“Great dreams... never even get out of the box. It takes an uncommon amount of guts to put your dreams on the line, to hold them up and say, "How good or how bad am I?" That's where courage comes in.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
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“All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
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“Have you any idea how many kids it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen? Three. It takes one to say, "What light?" and two more to say, "I didn't turn it on."”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
Similar Quotes. About: Children quotes, Ideas quotes.
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“It is ludicrous to read the microwave direction on the boxes of food you buy, as each one will have a disclaimer: "THIS WILL VARY WITH YOUR MICROWAVE." Loosely translated, this means, "You're on your own, Bernice."”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
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“Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
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“Once you get a spice in your home, you have it forever. Women never throw out spices. The Egyptians were buried with their spices. I know which one I'm taking with me when I go.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
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“There is nothing more miserable in the world than to arrive in paradise and look like your passport photo.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
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“Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
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“There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, "Yes, I've got dreams, of course I've got dreams." Then they put the box away and bring it out once in awhile to look in it, and yep, they're still there.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
Similar Quotes. About: Dreams quotes.
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