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“Christmas carolers sing about peace on earth, but they don’t tell us where.”
ariel

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“Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect.”
Oren Arnold quotes
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“There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.”
Erma Bombeck quotes (U.S. humorist, 1927-1996)
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“I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.”
Bernard Manning quotes
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“A turkey never voted for an early Christmas.”
Irish Proverb quotes
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“Christmas is a race to see which gives out first - your money or your feet.”

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“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”
Rosva Dr. Seuss quotes (American Writer and Cartoonist best known for his collection of children's books. 1904-1991)
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“The one thing I remember about Christmas was that my father used to take me out in a boat about ten miles offshore on Christmas Day, and I used to have to swim back. Extraordinary. It was a ritual. Mind you, that wasn't the hard part. The difficult bit was getting out of the sack.”
flo_tasker John Cleese quotes (English comic Actor (Monty Python), b.1939)
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“Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven.”
W. C. Fields quotes (American Comic and Actor, 1880-1946)
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“Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food, and beer conglomerates. Who'd have ever guessed that product consumption, popular entertainment, and spirituality would mix so harmoniously? It's a beautiful world all right.”
Bill Watterson quotes (American Author of the comic strip Calvin & Hobbes, b.1958)
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“I bought my brother some gift-wrap for Christmas. I took it to the Gift Wrap department and told them to wrap it, but in a different print so he would know when to stop unwrapping.”
Stephen Wright quotes (American Actor and Writer, b.1955)
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