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“A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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“Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 feet per second, is a cow that has been dropped out of a helicopter.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad.”
santiz Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Religion quotes, People quotes.
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“What Women Want: To be loved, to be listened to, to be desired, to be respected, to be needed, to be trusted, and sometimes, just to be held. What Men Want: Tickets for the world series.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“All of us are born with a set of instinctive fears - of falling, of the dark, of lobsters, of falling on lobsters in the dark, or speaking before a Rotary Club, and of the words "Some Assembly Required”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Fear quotes.
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“My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished 2 bags of M&M's and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't care.”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
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“Americans who travel abroad for the first time are often shocked to discover that, despite all the progress that has been made in the last 30 years, many foreign people still speak in foreign languages”
Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)
Similar Quotes. About: Travel quotes, Funny quotes, Language quotes, America and Americans quotes, Comedy quotes.
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