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Joan Rivers quotes

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American humorist, b.1935
Joan Rivers quotes
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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief, and, most of all, fear”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath.' For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor.”
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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“You make the beds, you wash the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“It's been so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up whom.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.”

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quote“Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise.”

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